Hey everyone, and happy belated one year anniversary of my accident. From the bottom of my heart I want to thank EACH of you for praying for and diligently thinking of and supporting me this last year. I can’t believe I’ve been so diligently presented to my Lord for healing and protection. When I get to heaven I’ll be sure to mention you all.
Like usual, my where-with-all to respond to the gifts and cards is not back yet. But I cannot overstate the love each one gives me. I feel so utterly alone in this battle 99.99999999999999999% of the time even though I have an amazing husband, friends, and twin sister to get through this all with. I really can’t stress what your messages and cards saying that you’re STILL praying for me means to me…
I’d like to give you some updates:
- Ryne and I recently went on a cruise together to quickly find out that we’re not cruise people. There were way too many kids for us to really relax. Not enough pools and not enough hot tubs. The alcohol (that I didn’t spill) and comedy were SO good though.
- At the end of our vacation we met two of our very dearest friends ( the Mocks ) with my sister and bro in law in Philadelphia to climb the Rocky Balboa steps. Unfortunately, the steps were closed (with no exception) for Jay Z, Cardi B, and Lizzo. Personally, I think if Jay-Z knew that “I was here” by Beyonce was one of my theme songs he probably would have let me climb the stairs. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i41qWJ6QjPI grab some tissues, you’re going to thank me later). Thanks to Ryne I was able to climb stairs TWICE as high anyway.
- My new therapists feel like my long lost family members! My Physical Therapist, Steven, is kind and super challenging, my favorite combo of a person. If that wasn’t enough he loves Jesus and loves being a father to his many kids. Like, actually loves. He fricken raised them, went to PT school, and homeschooled them at the same time so that THEY could receive full ride educations. And many of them did. So there’s that. He’s definitely my long lost father. Rachel, who is my Occupational Therapist, and meeting me TO RIDE HORSES in like an hour, has already made it possible for me to do photography again AND cook a meal. Ally, my speech therapist, reminds me SO much of my twin sissy. She fiercely advocates for me and protects my sleep. I mean come on, could I be any more fortunate? Plus Kathy, my social worker, and Dr. Gabara, my physician, will literally go to bat for me on just about anything. I wish everyone could receive care like this…
- Based on the love and support (which sometimes feels supernatural) coming in from friends and family I often wonder if God is using them to speak love to me right now.
- I am astounded and so grateful to be back at my old job at the Klump lab where everyone seems to value any capabilities I still harbor. I officially came back on Monday of last week and I was happily surprised to find cards and gifts showering my desk. Honestly, for some reason they love me sooo well. I still have to stew on the love to believe it’s real life. Fortunately, my supervisors at Hope are allowing me to work from home some days further mimicking the schedule I used to keep. Finally, my supervisor at Hope mentioned that Kelly is still willing to supervise my tllp (temporary licensed psychology) hours for me. omg!
- Lately, per my speech therapists urging, I’ve been trying to journal again. If you knew me well before the accident, then you would remember that journaling was my main way of speaking to God and sorting through my thoughts. So as illegible it can be sometimes, I ultimately think journaling is going to benefit me coming back to myself in the long run.
Finally I have a few prayer requests:
- The cloud of sadness over my head never lifts.
- I thought for the good part of this year that I’d been miraculously healed of my eating disorders only to hear that voice of self hatred roar it’s ugly head again.
- Couples counseling is great but I seriously don’t feel like letting Ryne into the depth of my pain.
Thank you all for continuing to follow my progress and support me and my family, it’s appreciated more than you’ll ever know!
October 13, 2019
I am so glad you have made such progress!!!!! I hope your sadness lifts and will pray for that.
October 13, 2019
Angie, your transparency is so lovely and refreshing. I love hearing how you’re doing. I’d also love to visit with you! I could even bring my 7 month old baby for some baby giggles. That sometimes helps with the cloud of sadness, even for a few moments. I’ll text you about visiting! Thank you for sharing yourself with us. We are praying for you always.
October 18, 2019
I have been following your progress from the day your accident happened. You do not know me. I was originally asked to pray for you by my granddaughter who was a student at MSU at the time. She has a friend who either knows you or is related to you. I live in a town south of Grand Rapids. It hurts my heart so to see you do so well physically but struggle mentally. This is only because I know exactly how you feel. My faith too is solid, I know all the verses that give encouragement, but the devil keeps trying to make me doubt. I have prayed and followed others who have gone through similar injuries or brain problems, and it does take a long time. It is so hard to accept that life will never be the same, but there is now a new life that God has for you. You have wonderful friends and a supportive husband to help you. Embrace their help and encouragement. I’m sure you realize God gave you these people to help you through. I am looking forward to the day when I read that you have found where God wants to use you next and I love the updates on how you are doing as I continue to pray for the healing of all of your body.
October 25, 2019
I thank God for helping you cope with your journey of healing through all the pain that you have and will be over coming. If I could take the pain from you, I would. Life bites everyone, Its how you deal with it that shows your true heart and soul. By reading your updates it’s clear to me that you will be a fighter through this obstacle, and all that will come to you in your life time. May God bless you and Ryne in the rest of your journeys in life. My love and hope for you has, and never will end.
January 20, 2020
I’m so glad to see how well your doing. Your story is an inspiration to others. Keep up the good work. Hold on to your faith. Remember God is with you always. God bless you. Thanks for sharing your story may it help others in need. A fun memory to make you lol . Blew up the school kitchen using baking soda and vinegar and we all wore baking soda in our hair and cleaned a big mess. Lol.